Eye on the Triangle

Emilia Rivadeneira 0:00
The views and opinions expressed during Eye on the Triangle do not represent WKNC or NC State [University] Student Media (instrumental starts).

Speaker 1 0:13
Your dial is currently tuned to Eye on the Triangle on WKNC 88.1 FM, HT-1. Thanks for listening. (instrumental resumes).

Speaker 1 0:28
Good morning, everyone. Hope you're enjoying your day. My name is Emilia Rivadeneira, host of Eye on the Triangle, and with[out] further ado, let's get into some news (instrumental resumes).

Speaker 1 0:48
Happy first day of class, Wolfpack! I am sending you all my best wishes for this new academic year, which personally, it's a little bit bittersweet for me as it marks my senior year here, but let's focus on the journey ahead. Here's to a year filled with growth, success and unforgettable experiences for everyone out there listening and yeah, I'm thrilled to kick off this new academic year with a special interview dedicated to navigating the college experience while prioritizing your wellness. We'll hear from an expert, share strategies, and explore everything related to wellness and having a balanced lifestyle while in college (instrumental resumes).

Emilia Rivadeneira 1:54
Well, hello again, and welcome to WKNC's Eye on the Triangle. I'm your host, Emilia Rivadeneira, joining me now is Alexis Steptoe, Assistant Director of Wellness and Recreation.

Alexis Steptoe 2:06
Yes.

Emilia Rivadeneira 2:08
Thank you so much for being here today, Alexis. How are you doing?

Alexis Steptoe 2:11
I'm doing well. How are you?

Emilia Rivadeneira 2:12
I'm doing good, thank you. It's a really hot day.

Alexis Steptoe 2:15
It's a hot day, and there's a lot happening on campus (Alexis chuckles).

Emilia Rivadeneira 2:18
Yes, for sure. And part of this interview is related to that- related to, like, you know, like our first-year students are moving in on campus and- like, you know, returners as well, like sophomores- everybody's just moving in on campus. So in this interview, I wanted to explore, you know- like, some valuable, like, tips and strategies for our first-year students, and, honestly, everyone on how to effectively balance, you know, college life and also maintaining overall wellness.

Alexis Steptoe 2:50
Sure, sure.

Emilia Rivadeneira 2:51
So yeah, kind of to like, get us started, could you explain what wellness truly encompasses and why it is, you know, important for students to prioritize it during their college college years, especially?

Alexis Steptoe 3:06
Yeah, for sure. So the idea of wellness or well-being is something that is individualized, but I kind of explain it, especially on NC State's campus, as we've got to have some type of common understanding. So NC State does have [a] wellness definition and our elements of wellness, we have six of them. You can find those on wellness.ncsu.edu 's website, but it's important to kind of have a frame of reference when we're talking about well-being, when we're addressing a campus as big as NC State. But when we really get down to the nitty gritty, wellness is very individualized, but really comprises a variety of things that range from our physical, emotional, our connections to others, community. All these different pieces impact our overall well being and how we arrive at it. And sometimes we kind of lump everything into a bucket, and we're like, yeah, "be well." Okay, but which part of my wellness? We might be thriving in some areas. It might be a little off in others. So it's helpful to recognize that they are interconnected, that they do work together, but then we can look at them independently as well, and they're kind of like dominoes, one impacts the other, and they all kind of fold into one another. But it's helpful sometimes to orient yourself and say, "Okay, I'm feeling really connected on campus. I've got some good, you know, strides in my academic life, but man, my sleep is really out of whack," or "I really haven't been connecting with people that I love or like calling back home as much as I would like to." And so that gives us some clues as to what we can do about how we're feeling about our well-being. It's also really helpful just to approach it, especially in this college demographic because you are learning already. That's the- that's the idea when we're here, is that we're learning, we're seeking information and knowledge specifically in our degree programs, but I really like to take the opportunity to, like, think of well-being as a class that's all about you. So like, right now, you're learning things for your discipline, and that's important, because you're going to go on into a career field where you need that. But, then along the way, you don't want to neglect yourself and forget to learn about yourself and what helps you be your best, or what things really add to how you fully arrive in that workplace or in that career setting, or whatever the next step is for you. So this is a prime time to really lay the groundwork for healthy habits for a lifetime. A lot of times when we arrive at college, many of us, this is like our first time doing stuff on our own, and so it can be up to us to figure it out. And that can be really awesome in some ways and really spooky in other ways, where you have to figure out, "hey, what is it that makes me be well? What does wellness even mean to me if I'm not at home having my meals prepared for me, and I'm responsible for fueling myself now. How do I do that in the midst of classes and extracurricular commitments and all of the above?" So I think college is really a great time to plant the seed. But our goal and our hope is that you don't just learn stuff while you're here. You want to learn things that you take with you. So how you start your first year at NC State will likely not be the same way you are when you walk across the stage and get that diploma and even that thereafter, we want to teach you skills to be able to evolve with yourself and be able to be a real curious learner about your health and your well-being along the way, so that you can have skills for a lifetime.

Emilia Rivadeneira 6:20
Yeah, for sure. And it's interesting what you mentioned, because like wellness does mean, you know, like something different to a lot of people, to, like, different people. And we have so many people on campus, and so we have so many different definitions of wellness itself. And so kind of like, my next question was about that, about, like, how, you know, can students define wellness for themselves in a way that is, you know, both meaningful and as you mentioned, but also achievable, just like, you know, with classes and all of the stuff that we have going on?

Alexis Steptoe 7:00
Yeah, for sure, I really like the definition of wellness that we have at NC State. It's rooted in data and research, but also it's a bit long (both chuckle). It's a bit long, and sometimes the words you're like, "well, maybe community and social, isn't it for me," but it might be spirituality, or it might be something else that's really important to you. And so I think some simple, serviceable ways to kind of frame well being in a meaningful way is like, when you feel that you are your most- most nourished, and that's like mind, body, all of the different components. And so I would say having the opportunity to, just like ask yourself that question, but be honest. Like, we hear a lot of shoulds, like, "we should sleep, we should do, we should," all these things, but like, what really matters to you? And so there's another definition that is from the National Wellness Institute, NWI, and they say "wellness is the ability to understand your current position and make strides to change it when you need to." So like that would be my best way of, kind of identifying how you can simply and servicefully be able to challenge yourself and change you know what you want to but also honor and celebrate the things that you're naturally good at. Like the social aspect comes easy to me. That's like a part that I value and comes naturally to me. I also want to challenge myself for the things that, like I know that are important to me. Like, if I'm not getting good sleep, I'm not able to show up as my best-self. So I'm a night owl. I want to stay up late and I want to rise later, but that's not how my life is set up. So I got to challenge myself to change it up.

Emilia Rivadeneira 8:40
Yeah, and I feel like college is especially, you know, like the space for just like us students to, you know, challenge ourselves to, like, kind of like, discover what those things that we need to change up are. So, kind of, like turning the scope more into, like, how to manage, you know, like balance and wellness and overall, like college life. What are some common challenges that you have seen like over the years, working at NC State, that college students face, and regarding you know, wellness and how can they effectively address those challenges?

Alexis Steptoe 9:22
Yeah. So I think if we, if we were to ask, like, you know, tiny mic-style, out on the Brickyard, or just, you know, walk by and ask folks, "Hey, what are some things that you're dealing with as a student? What, what gets in the way of practicing wellness?" Number one: time. Time is like a common denominator. It doesn't matter if you're a first-year, a grad student, an employee here, working in a res-hall, or working in the dining hall. Time is that kind of common denominator that's like, it all kind of comes back to that. So if we, if we can become really skilled at managing the things that are like, have-to-do's, like we got to show up to class. We got to turn in the paper. We got to be present for our shift, and include those things that like we want to do or we need to do for our overall well-being. We have to kind of be masters of our time and be very good at, I don't want to say maximize time because I feel like that is that has a like- a kind of icky connotation, but, being able to just understand what's on your board and how to adequately prioritize. I think that's something that students really struggle with, because if it comes down to, like, the academic impediments- which is stress management, internet use, things like that- those pieces all tie back to time. So that would be kind of like the like, one of the foundational pieces that I think all of us could benefit from.

Other things that I see students really, really struggle with, is stress management. This is one of those skills that we learn when we have to, but, my- I'm in the business of prevention, and I want you to have practice time before you need it, to see how you would use it. Or be able to even understand, "how do I know when stress shows up at my doorstep? Oh, it actually results in, you know, a lot of back pain, or maybe I'm getting sick more frequently," or whatever it might be. You want to be able to be aware of what it how it presents in yourself, so you can be, "mmm I see what's going on here," and have a little more insight for yourself, but then also you got to know what to do with it. Our motto at NC State is "Think and Do." So we want to think about what's going on, but we also have to bridge that gap and be able to do something about what's going on. So the stress management is a huge piece. I think a lot of students are also really struggling with, like balancing screens, balancing technology, balancing in-person versus online. Those are things that come as a huge challenge for all of us, and we're all kind of navigating it together.

And then it wouldn't be a college campus if we didn't talk about sleep. Sleep being one of those things that, again, comes back to time, and this is where I will, like, kind of like, to include some some education. We often are thinking about, like, our wellness in this, like, present moment, right here, right now, and not playing the long game, and we're doing behaviors or actions for the now. Like, "yeah, I'm gonna stay up and cram for that exam," or "I'm going to stay up and, you know, go hang with friends, because I've had a busy, busy day." And we're not really thinking about the long-term implications of reduced sleep-quality on our overall health and our performance as being a student. Like you got to have a good, clear mind that is well-rested to be able to retain information and utilize it. But then, long-term, for our health, it's going to show it's- it's going to show its wear on us over time if we're not sleeping well. So time management, stress management, sleep is one of the the main things that I see students struggle with. That Internet use is something that we all battle with, myself included. So those are some of the things that float to the top. And then, you know, you kind of pick out one and then another one unfolds. You're like, "ah, yeah." So the list could go on and on, but those are kind of the top ones that, like, tiny mic-style. We're asking people, they're like, "yep, it's time, it's stress, it's- it's sleep," it's all of those kind of foundational things.

But then to, like, flip the coin on the other side. So, like, this is what we struggle with. How do we do something about it? How do we transition to that place? And it's really about keeping it simple. Like, especially if we are new to campus, or we're in an especially busy season, maybe you're a senior and you're getting ready to start looking in the job market or wondering what your next steps are, naturally, there is, like, an element of transitions that's happening there. So your mind is kind of already at capacity with a lot of other thoughts that you're thinking. So thinking about like, "well, I've got to hit the gym, you know, five times a week and make sure that I'm, you know, having at least an hour of quality time with my loved ones," and then, you know, and you start adding these things on, that feels like a lot. So then how can we reduce it down to the most actionable things that like are foundational to our well-being? If you're kind of feeling like, how do I take care of myself right now in this time? Check on your sleep. Check on if you're eating regularly throughout the day. Check on if you are drinking water, if you're drinking more coffee than you are water; you all can't see my face, but I'm giving a little, a little head nod out there. Checking in on some of those foundational things that help us just kind of keep the boat afloat. And then once you're like, you know, getting closer to shore, and you're like, "oh, now I can add on that extra gym time," or "I can add on that extra, you know, hang out time with my friends," do that when you get there. But just to, like, keep it going, you got to check in on the foundations, which are, eat well, sleep well, move,well, to be well overall.

Emilia Rivadeneira 14:52
No, yeah, for sure. Definitely agree on that. And kind of talking about, you know, move-in is happening right now. And so, like, our first-year, students are transitioning to, you know, like this new aspect of college life and stuff. And my question is just like, how can students manage that stress and, even like, sometimes anxiety associated with just like, transitioning to college life? Especially, you know, the first few days and even the first few months, I would say, of college where, like, everything, just like, feels kind of overwhelming for them. So how can they just balance, or find a balance for that?

Alexis Steptoe 15:37
Yeah, for sure. I would say, you know, seek support early. And support doesn't have to be like, you know, all the way to the Counseling Center right away. Maybe you're tapping in with some professors, or maybe you're tapping in with people that are on your hall, or maybe you're connecting back with your older sibling that also went to State, or whatever it might be, just to get some perspective there. But then also recognizing that, like, there is a time when I'm going to need more support than what my friends and my loved ones can provide, and being aware of the resources early is always helpful, because when we're in a heightened state of stress and there's a lot happening all at one time- we only have but so much, you know, vision that we can see in front or around us, because it's all consumed with like (mimics panicked panting). So if we already have a nugget that's like, planted in our mind, a little seed that's like, "ooh, when times get like this, I know I can do that." Our minds do really, really good when we have a script to follow, like coming to the school right now and like arriving on campus, you don't have any basis for any of this. This is like all new experiences, so you don't know what you're like, "wake up first, then blah, then the building is over there, and then halfway through, I stop at the dining hall." You haven't figured that out yet. You will, you will. So trust that you will figure it out.

But the more that we can think about like giving yourself directions when those high-stress times come, or when we're feeling that overwhelm or that anxiety is creeping in, we've already got something that we've run through in our mind that we can lean on and not have to figure out, like in the moment, like, "where is the..." "I've already- I've already been there, or I already have visited the website, or I already have talked to someone, or I have that pamphlet in my bag from orientation." Like, we already have a next step that is, like, in the queue, so we don't have to go, like, rummaging around and feeling frantic about that. So that would be one of my biggest pieces of advice is, like, really thinking about what you'll need most ahead of time. And sometimes we don't know. Like, we're not fortune tellers, and we can't, you know, see into the future. So we might like all be like, "yeah, this is feeling good." And we're here, like, month one, month two, and then month three. You're like, "wait a second, midterms." Or you're like, "first semester, (mimics car speeding by), second semester, whoa." So we can't always be able to predict, but to the best of our ability, just having some general awareness and knowledge and knowing that there is a next step relieves a lot of that in the meantime,

Emilia Rivadeneira 18:08
For sure, definitely. And kind of like, in the same vibe, you know, like, now we're talking about, like, what's- what are those next step- sorry, next steps. I wanted to ask you more about like, what is the Wellness and Recreation Center doing? Or like, especially, or like you are doing to kind of, like, provide those aspects of like, wellness here on campus, if you can talk a little bit about that as well.

Alexis Steptoe 18:37
Yeah, for sure. I would love to (both chuckle). Yeah, so I feel really fortunate to be in a position where I get to do stuff that I'm super passionate about as part of my work. And so as a- as a professional on this campus, I feel a great duty of service to the students being able to think about things and try to reduce barriers for you all when it comes to taking advantage of all these- there's a billion-trillion resources out there, but sometimes it's a lot to, like, figure out how to get to it. "Where do you go? What do I need?" And so I like to do a lot of the thinking behind like, "what would trip somebody up along the way?" And so at Wellness and Recreation, my team, in specific, I'm Assistant Director of wellness; I oversee the thrivewall team. Our team in particular, does a lot of, kind of pulling all of the pieces together; all of the things across campus, things within our department, and kind of packaging them in a way that provides awareness and education. So if I had to, like, break up what we do, I would say we offer a service wing, which is our wellness coaching program. And wellness coaching is designed for any student, all students. Doesn't matter to us, you know, if you're undergrad, grad student. You change every time that we, you know, have a season change in our lives. So we provide coaching in a one-on-one capacity to let. You work on whatever's important to you at that time, and we do it with nationally-certified coaches that really care deeply about seeing you succeed and whatever you determine is important for you. So that's like our service wing, that's like your one-on-one time where you're coming to problem-solve and, like, think through some things.

But then we have this other wing of us that does, I would say, Outreach and Events, and so that team really emphasizes creating experiences for students. So our outreach side does a lot of the Howl and Chill. So you'll see we have monthly Howl and Chill programs that we really market and promote. That is an opportunity for social self-care. Like you all have a lot on your schedule, and to add another to-do feels like a to-not. And if you have to think of like, the "who, what, when, where," we want to reduce all of that for you all and just give you something that you can sign up and show up for. So those are great times to like, you know, come as a group, if you've already got an established group and like, "hey, let's do something that's low cost. It's free. Do something that's low cost. It's on campus, and it's already developed for us. We just sign up and show up," or if you're a person that's like, "I'm really trying to get out of my shell and meet more people" or like, "maybe I'm not trying to have a bestie, but I just want to be around people," because that's important for our overall well-being too. So the Howl and Chill is a great opportunity to have these unique experiences that our student-developed. Our student-staff come up with the ideas, and we help them bring it to life, but they're designed with the student in mind.

And then the other part of our Outreach and Events wing is that we do host semesterly Wellness Challenges. So we want to also think about the students that are not on NC State's campus. So we're talking about people moving-in and making their way to campus, but we also have distance-learning students or students that are in programs that are maybe non-traditional or joint programs with us and another university. There's, you know, many, many types of students that we have at State, and so we want to make sure that that student feels like they are included. And we also want to make sure that when there's times where you don't have the, like, social battery to come sit and be with us or talk to somebody else, that if you want to stay up to date or or encourage yourself to be more mindful about your well-being, that you can do that. So we host Wellness Challenges that are education and awareness-based around certain topics that we talked about earlier. We do mindfulness. We do a step-challenge that encourages more movement. We do a challenge around sleep, or hydration, or finances, or, you know, a number of things, but we're pairing education and awareness with resources. So we want to help you navigate "okay, if I'm talking about mindfulness, here's a route that I can go to some drop in spaces that prevention services are is offering," or "how I can get connected with some art therapy through the counseling center" or whatever it might be. So we take the lift off of you for having to navigate the different campus partners and the different resources that are out there, and try to package them in a way that gives you what the topic is and then a place that you can go. So that's like my team specifically that I oversee.

But as a broader Wellness and Recreation team, our goal is to really think about using movement as a tool, and we don't care how you move. We don't care where you move. I mean, please come to our beautiful, shiny building, because we really designed it with with the students in-mind and wanting you all to have onus over that space. But we just encourage you to move, because it is part of managing a healthy lifestyle for many, many reasons. But if we go back to those foundations, like what students struggle with most, stress, moving is a great stress reliever. We call it 'meditation in motion.' You can really move through a lot of worry, doubt, overwhelm, perfectionism, whatever it might be by using your body to, like, release some of that. So sign up for a group fitness class. Those are free and offered, I mean, early morning to late in the evening, so we've got something for everybody. Come shoot a basketball, you know, around on the court for open recreation, or join an intramural club- or an intramural sport if you want to participate with others in a low-stakes kind of environment. Or if you're like, "hey, I just want to shake up my day and be somewhere, you know, get a little movement, but not have to, like, huff and puff and be sweaty." We have an active study space where we encourage you all to come in, and if you're like, say you're checking through emails, or you're like, proofreading your paper, you can walk on a treadmill desk while you're doing that. So those are some things that are like more broad about Wellness and Recreation, but our overall goal is to really use the movement aspect as a part of your- your toolbox that you can lean on for all of the different things, meeting people, managing stress, practicing good, healthy habits for a lifetime. We want to give you all that opportunity in a way that feels warm and inviting and that you can see yourself there. Again, even if you're not physically at our space, our goal still remains the same.

Emilia Rivadeneira 24:52
Yeah, for sure. And no, definitely; there's just so many resources out there that it's just- just amazing overall. But on the same wavelength, of like, you know, like, there's so many resources too. And, like a lot of people, you know, don't know, you know, where, or like, what to choose from, yeah. What would you, like, recommend to students that are kind of like, "oh, like, I know that there's just, like, so many resources out there for me, but I just, like, I just like, don't know, like what to do or like where to go." yeah,

Alexis Steptoe 25:28
Yeah, for sure. Sometimes we can have a little paralysis when it comes to what to take action on. It's like, "ah, okay, there's like, 20 options," and we don't always do the best at our decision-making when there's too many options. So maybe you reduce the number of things that you're looking at on your board. Like we like to talk about things in terms of, like a buffet. There's- there's tons of things on your buffet when you go through the line at One Earth and you're making your salad, or you're going through some of the different stations and figuring out what you want to eat for the day. There's a lot of different options out there, and one day you might have a taste for a salad, and one day you might have a taste for a hot meal. It changes day to day; it changes in different seasons of your life. But if you can think about the things that are like, true- naturally true to you, like the essence of you. Like I am an extrovert, I get my energy from being around people. And so I know that if I'm feeling like I want to take advantage of something or or participate in something, it's meaning that I'm going to go be with people, versus someone else might be the opposite, where it's like "I've done enough of that," or "my- my battery's full. I want to maybe participate in, you know, a an e-group, or maybe I want to participate in teletherapy versus on-campus [therapy]." Like there's different ways to, kind of, get to what you need based on what you already naturally know about yourself. So I would say, use that as an option for kind of guiding what you want to do with all the things that are available to you.

And then I really, like to sink down to, like, my deep-knowing. Like, if there is something that keeps like, you know, yeah, nagging at you like, "Man, I really, should. I really should I'm feeling like I need..." And you keep having this, like, recurring feeling of something. Seek that out first, because that's going to satisfy the need that your your subconscious is telling you, like, "hey, I'm feeling like I want to, need to connect with..." or whatever it might be. So like, sink down to that place and, like, listen to yourself and then try to pick the resources that align most with that thing first. And then there's like, tons of other stuff that you could try later, but like, satisfy that first so you feel a mini-win. The- a big part of like exploring health and well-being, and like continuing to stay engaged in it is feeling like something worked, or feeling like you like, cracked a code, or that you like, "oh yeah, got a star for the day." So if we can find the thing that like satisfies that, or gives us the opportunity to even say that, like "I experienced that," that's going to keep us more primed to be in that space, and, you know, seek those things out more regularly, or even broaden our perspective. Like maybe you did try the intramural thing and you're like, "no, actually, I just really want to go and, you know, casually shoot the basketball and not have to show up at a dedicated time." You know, there- there's no harm in trying something. It'll only open your perspective.

And then I would also say, you know, really thinking about, like along your journey, preemptively thinking of these things. Like I said that before, but like having something in mind of what you might want to do, that can help narrow the search and mean that you spend less time sorting through things, and you're just like, "you know what I'm going in that direction." I love this quote, also; I don't know where I heard it, I was just like, somewhere, and it stood out to me, and this was, like, a couple of years ago. And so this is my encouragement to a first-year, a second-year, anyone, is that if you're seeking out stuff, or if you're trying something new, or if you're exploring a new route to take care of yourself, and you feel like it didn't work. "Oh man, I tried that thing and it didn't work," a stumble is still a step. So even if you (makes 'do-doot' noise) trip up, or even if you didn't do as well as you thought on an assignment, or even if you, you know, tried this thing and it didn't work out, or you went for an internship and you didn't land it, or whatever the thing is, putting yourself out there, taking a little step, and even if you trip up or you stumble, it's still motion. It's still towards something, even if it's a little grainy and we don't know what that thing is yet, or it doesn't feel like we're we're headed anywhere; we're just moving. Moving is moving, and we'll take that over staying stuck any day.

Emilia Rivadeneira 29:51
Yeah, I mean, a win is a win-

Alexis Steptoe 29:53
Yeah-

Emilia Rivadeneira 29:53
after all, so-

Alexis Steptoe 29:55
We're gonna take all the w's that we can.

Emilia Rivadeneira 29:57
Yes.

Alexis Steptoe 29:57
No matter how big, how small, if it's italicized, if it's underlined, if it's like, you know, two-point font. We will take a W,

Emilia Rivadeneira 30:06
Ye,s indeed. And I really like the phrase a "win is a win,"

Alexis Steptoe 30:09
Yeah, yeah.

Emilia Rivadeneira 30:10
It just goes along with everything. But another question that I wanted to ask you, kind of like, one of my final questions was just like, you know, a lot of students kind of struggle with like, besides like, finding, you know what they want to do, also finding, kind of like a- how to set it like a boundary, if like that even makes sense. Because, like, you know, there's balance. But I feel like some students are just like, too lock[rd] in, you know, like, really- like on academics, or like, even, like, sometimes with their work or, like, with other student organizations.

Alexis Steptoe 30:46
Yeah.

Emilia Rivadeneira 30:46
And that's- that's perfect, you know, they're like being social. They're like doing well academically, but like, they do not know how to, like, find like, you know- like, okay, like, a boundary between like academics and the like wellness as well. And so, like, they kind of like, slack on, like, one of the two-

Alexis Steptoe 31:04
Yeah.

Emilia Rivadeneira 31:04
And so what would be, kind of, like some tips, or, like a recommendation that you would give to them?

Alexis Steptoe 31:09
Yeah. That is, I mean, a wonderful question that I think so many of us will be faced with, or are currently faced with: that it's- it's hard to define lines that are up to you- to define it's like nobody's telling you to go all-in this way or that way. Sometimes it's self- we are, like, inflicting it on ourselves, or telling ourselves that it has to be all this and none of that, or "if I'm not doing this, then, you know, wasting my time," or, like, whatever it might be. Or if it's like- I had one student and I'm like, "oh my, we're gonna have a moment here." But it's like, "well, why would I rest when I should be trying to figure out this?" It was like something as part of a as part of their dissertation, like "I should be trying to figure out this." I think it was like a formula equation, stuff that is not my wheelhouse. But I'm like, "hmm," so we just sat there for a second. I'm like, okay, "so why rest?" Yeah, then the more we chatted, it's like, "well, I feel like I'm wasting my time, or that that time is- could be better used if I just stayed locked in," like you said, stayed locked in. I said," so how is staying locked in working for you right now?" We haven't figured it out yet, so maybe if we take a step back, let our mind kind of go offline for a bit with the problem that we're trying to solve, and we come back to it, we might have a new, refreshed mind about it. And we might have a different perspective on it, or that the answer might have been right there with you all along, but you're so locked in on that thing that you forgot to, like, scan the other side of the page, and then you're like, "oh, it was, it was right there all along."

So when it comes to like, setting boundaries, when it comes to academics, well-being, friend groups, organizations, I mean, the list goes on; it really starts with you. And boundaries are not for anyone else, they're for yourself. That's like, the hardest thing to acknowledge is that, like, you don't have to- other people don't have to participate in your boundary, because they will or they won't. But for you, you're the one that has to engage and interface with your life. So the boundaries for yourself- and it's a protection mechanism. It's something that we use to include our knowledge and things that we know are important to us, our values, our strengths, all of that good stuff, and also acknowledge that it might be hard to say no. Or it might be we feel a personal responsibility because "I started the student org, and now I'm graduating as a senior, and nobody stepped up, so I feel like I have to keep doing this-" you know, whatever it might be.

So a great way to practice boundary setting is with yourself and start small. So one thing that I like to do, especially in the wellness coaching space, is encourage people to start small and make- make and keep one small promise to yourself each day. So whether that is turning off your phone at a certain time, taking a break midway through the day to step outside of the lab and breathe some fresh air and then walk back in. Whatever that smallest, tiniest thing is, the W-

Emilia Rivadeneira 34:21
(Rivadeneira chuckes) yeah.

Alexis Steptoe 34:22
-the two point font win- we're going to start there, but we're going to start with ourself. Because we have to build trust within ourselves that when it comes to the next thing, when it comes to that boundary that's outside of yourself, and now you're having to, you know, say with your your res-hall mate, or maybe your research professor, or whatever it is that you're you're trying to communicate a boundary, sometimes we've got to kind of, like, build our confidence up and build our trust up that like you're going to be able to say it and communicate it in a way that honors what you really mean, and that you're going to be able to enforce it. So that is the part where we get to really think about if I make this one small promise to myself and I keep it, then I'll let myself know that I meant what I said and I followed through. And so that would be my kind of encouragement about that. And it's really to keep shifting our mindset around. Like, why- like ask the question, "why do I feel that way," or "what is this result that I'm wanting to yield, and can I still achieve it if I do hold this boundary." And when we have that conversation with ourselves or use, you know, some some of our close friends or your therapist or a wellness coach or whoever it is, to hold yourself accountable and kind of see it through, we give ourselves the confidence that we do know how to take care of ourselves, that we can be good stewards of all aspects of our lives. And we don't have to compromise one or the other and make it to the finish line and feel like you left you know three parts of yourself behind, and it's going to take another six months for it to catch up. You want to move- move as a pack. You want your whole total being to arrive at whatever the thing is all together. So being able to have that opportunity to build trust lets your your mind and your body know that "all parts of me matter." And I don't arrive in my academics without good sleep, well-being, whatever it might be. And I don't arrive at well-being and, you know, satisfying my purpose in life without this academic component. So they work together, and we want to move them forward and advance them as a pack. So set that small promise to yourself each day and keep it. And when you do, I mean, like, lean into it, see it for that W and be like, "you know what-" or I'm imagining putting, like, the little sparkle emoji beside it, like "mmm that dded a little something to it; I said it and I did it." Oh yeah, that's like, adding the- adding the sparkle on top (both chuckle).

Emilia Rivadeneira 36:52
No, yeah, definitely. Well, yeah, this has been such an insightful interview about wellness. Like, even for me now that I'm in my senior year, like, I'm like, listening to all of this, and I'm like, "okay, yeah. Like, I-"

Alexis Steptoe 36:53
Yay! That makes me happy to hear. That makes me happy to hear. I wasn't speaking to your heart directly, but I'm so glad that it picked up for you, because I think nothing- nobody can understand being a student at State other than a student at State. And so when I'm saying these messages and sharing these topics really broadly, even for the one, you know, even for the one that's listening, or I'm playing this back, or maybe it's, you know, two weeks later and you're listening to it, even for the one, this matters. Your health, your well-being matters, and your whole person matters too.

Emilia Rivadeneira 37:37
Yeah, for sure, and makes a difference. And so is there anything else you would like to add before, you know, we end the interview?

Alexis Steptoe 37:46
No, I don't- I think that covers everything. And I just, again, am so grateful to be able to share this with you all. And I love working with the students and getting- you all pour so much, especially anyone who is, you know, working with others, or being part of, you, know, contributing to the collective community at NC State. I love to pour into the students, because you all are what makes this campus vibrant. You all are what makes this campus be what it is- is known for being. And so if nobody else has said it to you, if nobody else tells it to you, if this is the first time you're hearing it, and you're coming in as a new student, or you're on your way out, "you are what makes this campus great, and I'm so happy that I get to be in service to you also."

Yeah, thank you so much, and thank you so much for being here today with me. (instrumental starts) it was amazing to talk to you today, for sure.

And likewise.

Emilia Rivadeneira 39:03
This has been your host, Emilia Rivadeneira. Thanks for listening to Eye on the Triangle. For back-episodes of the show, go to wknc.org/podcasts. Music In today's episode is Krakatoa by Noah Stark, licensed under creative commons.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai